Tackling Problematic MILs
If you get along great with your mother-in-law, then it’s great. There are lots of women who love their mother-in -laws because she is kind, caring, and down-to-earth. Unfortunately there are many of us with controlling mothers-in-laws too.
A mother with healthy behavior will elegantly step aside and encourage her son to make his wife his first priority. Some mothers however make the move difficult by manipulating him with guilt whenever he tried to make his wife his first priority. Possessive mother will always consider every woman incapable of looking after her son’s needs and even if she agreed to the marriage, she might have done so halfheartedly.
Studies have shown that a widow mother’s love towards her only son is extremely unusual. The widow mother will project all her love towards her dead husband onto her only son, who becomes her only prop of life and spirit, and the widow mother has a very strong desire to control her son. Thus this maternal love is usually abnormal.
In some cases, your husband’s parents might not be actually responsible for the rift; it might be your husband’s loyalty to them that might be the actual reason for all the problems.
Keeping your calm is not easy when you feel disrespected by the very people your spouse hold highest regard. Of course, tolerance has its limit. As much as possible do not keep those toxic emotions bottled up. If you do, you will end-up taking it out on your spouse and his loved ones once you reach boiling point.
If his mother wants to fume and blame you, let her stew in her own anger and stress, while you let it go and be happy with your hubby and your life. After all, life is moving so fast and we are missing out on each others life so much and then we are going to wonder if all this bitterness was worth it. You only get one chance in life.
A mother with healthy behavior will elegantly step aside and encourage her son to make his wife his first priority. Some mothers however make the move difficult by manipulating him with guilt whenever he tried to make his wife his first priority. Possessive mother will always consider every woman incapable of looking after her son’s needs and even if she agreed to the marriage, she might have done so halfheartedly.
Studies have shown that a widow mother’s love towards her only son is extremely unusual. The widow mother will project all her love towards her dead husband onto her only son, who becomes her only prop of life and spirit, and the widow mother has a very strong desire to control her son. Thus this maternal love is usually abnormal.
In some cases, your husband’s parents might not be actually responsible for the rift; it might be your husband’s loyalty to them that might be the actual reason for all the problems.
Keeping your calm is not easy when you feel disrespected by the very people your spouse hold highest regard. Of course, tolerance has its limit. As much as possible do not keep those toxic emotions bottled up. If you do, you will end-up taking it out on your spouse and his loved ones once you reach boiling point.
If his mother wants to fume and blame you, let her stew in her own anger and stress, while you let it go and be happy with your hubby and your life. After all, life is moving so fast and we are missing out on each others life so much and then we are going to wonder if all this bitterness was worth it. You only get one chance in life.
Labels: family, in-law issues, mother-in-law, tackling problematic mother in laws
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