Tantrums can be downright frustrating

Tantrums are the trademark of the toddler. They're equally common in boys and girls and usually occur from age 1 to age 3.Even the most good-natured toddler has an occasional temper tantrum. They're a normal part of development. Temper tantrums range from whining and crying to screaming, kicking, hitting, and breath holding. Toddlers are also trying to master their world and when they aren't able to accomplish a task, they often use one of the only tools at their disposal for venting frustration — a tantrum.
Several basic causes of tantrums are familiar to parents everywhere. The child is seeking attention or is tired, hungry, or uncomfortable. In addition, tantrums are often the result of kids' frustration with the world — they can't get something to do what they want.
The best way to deal with temper tantrums is to avoid them in the first place, whenever possible.
Make sure your child isn't acting up simply because he or she isn't getting enough attention. To a child, negative attention is better than no attention at all. Try to establish a habit of catching your child being good ,which means rewarding your little one with attention for positive behavior.
Try to give toddlers some control over little things. This may fulfill the need for independence and ward off tantrums. Offer minor choices that will make him/ her happy and satisfied.
Keep off-limits objects out of sight and out of reach to make struggles less likely to develop over them. Obviously, this isn't always possible, especially outside of the home where the environment can't be controlled.
Distract your child. Take advantage of your little one's short attention span by offering a replacement for the coveted object or beginning a new activity to replace the frustrating or forbidden one. Or simply change the environment. Take your toddler outside or inside or move to a different room.
Set the stage for success when kids are playing or trying to master a new task. Offer age-appropriate toys and games. Also, start with something simple before moving on to more challenging tasks.
Consider the request carefully when your child wants something. Is it outrageous? Maybe it isn't. Accommodate when you can.
Know your child's limits. If you know your toddler is tired, it's not the best time to go grocery shopping or try to squeeze in one more errand.
The most important thing to keep in mind when you're faced with a child in the throes of a tantrum, no matter what the cause, is simple and crucial: Keep cool. Don't complicate the problem with your own frustration. Instead, take deep breaths and try to think clearly.
Hitting and spanking don't help; physical tactics send the message that using force and physical punishment is OK. Instead, have enough self-control for both of you.
First, try to understand what's going on. Tantrums should be handled differently depending on the cause. It's a different situation when the tantrum stems from a child's being refused something. Toddlers have fairly rudimentary reasoning skills. Ignoring the outburst is one way to handle it — if the tantrum poses no threat to your child or others. Continue your activities, paying no attention to your child but remaining within sight. Don't leave your little one alone, though, otherwise he or she may feel abandoned on top of all of the other uncontrollable emotions.
Kids who are in danger of hurting themselves or others during a tantrum should be taken to a quiet, safe place to calm down. This also applies to tantrums in public places.
Older kids are more likely to use tantrums to get their way if they've learned that this behavior works. Once kids are school age, it's appropriate to send them to their rooms to cool off. Rather than setting a specific time limit, parents can tell them to stay in the room until they've has regained control. The former option is empowering — kids can affect the outcome by their own actions, thereby gaining a sense of control that was lost during the tantrum.
Remember, tantrums usually aren't cause for concern and generally diminish on their own. As kids mature developmentally and their grasp of themselves and the world increases, their frustration levels decrease.